Love and courage

When you have a difficult time in school, at work or home, what's the first word you want to hear the most from your loved ones? I think it's love, unconditional. Love makes you feel being understood and makes you strong. So that you have the courage to face and deal with the challenges in life. Love makes you feel encouraged automatically because you don't want to let your loved ones down. Suggestions or even critisim are taken more easily and effectively based on love.

Sometimes, the unpleasant events we encoutered are partially due to our own fault. However, the first word I want to hear the most from my loved ones is not an objective and calm analysis of what happened. I want love and compassion first. I can then cool down and put myself together as a stronger me for tomorrow. John has always been supportive and patient as long as I don't complain about the same thing repeatedly. Then he would want me to get out of the bad mood and think about what to do, either to remedy or to avoid similar things in the future. Remembering once I was very upset about things at work. I complained to him for about 15 minutes. He started to recommend what to do next to remedy and fight back. Then I said: "I don't want to hear this; I am not finished complaining yet." John said:" I thought you are done. Why do you need to repeat the same thing over and over? Why not just think about actions?" This sounds a little funny now, but at that time, I was upset and vulnerable and need a lot of love. With me getting more mature and gaining more working experience, I am able to get out of the unpleasant mood more and more quickly. I would think about solutions and actions myself after complaining for about 5 minutes. But again, when we were young and fresh, we need a lot of love from the family.

Love wouldn't make you timid; love would make you courageous; love makes you face the world confidently; love makes you want to achieve something, not only for youself, but for your loved ones.

I am trully feeling that life is like a desert without love.

昨天爸爸打电话解释妈妈的性格, 说到许多年前我春节左右在北京上新东方, 打电话回家时哭了. 妈妈当时具体说的什么记不得了, 只记得大概是: 有什么好哭和难受得, 又不愁吃穿, 有学校上 (不理解和不屑的语气大有觉得我身在富中不知富的感觉)......爸爸说妈妈这样说不是就让你没有那么难受了吗? 爸爸说如果说心疼你很受苦,你不是就会不上学而回家了. 当时也没有辩解什么, 后来想想觉得这个问题很有意思. 父母对孩子说心疼说理解说同情, 孩子就会很懦弱不敢面对困难要当逃兵吗? 反之, 父母对孩子在学校和生活中遇到的困难一概以"不愁吃穿还身在富中不知富"来教训, 孩子就会很勇敢吗? 不知道别的孩子会怎么接受, 我只知道他们那样对我和我后来的努力奋斗没有什么关系, 只是让我的心很冷. 相反他们如果表示同情和理解, 我可能努力奋斗的时候会更有动力.

这一切都过去了, 我现在有了自己的家, 再也没有对他们倾诉的欲望和需要. 我只是在思考爱与勇气的关系. 我仍然认为绝大多数人都会因为爱而更开心地勇敢面对困难和生活.